Fathering

The Absent Black Father
Dorothy Roberts writes The Absent Black Father to highlight the lack of presence of black males She suggests that because of this all pressure is put onto the mothers’, causing the definition of motherhood to be much broader. Roberts starts off suggesting the importance of two parents in children’s lives, ultimately suggesting that a huge reason for problems in society has steamed from the absence or lack of involvement of black fathers. Roberts points out the repeating pattern of the absent black father in black families. This lack of presence results in the mother taking on an abundance of roles that should be shared with two people. This setup is unlike most that we are used to seeing. Though many times the emotional contributions of a father are not emphasized their financial contributions are. They are typically seen as breadwinners yet are not even present to contribute that. It is expected of the male to contribute and also expose the children to a world of business ultimately encouraging them to take on the roles that he now holds. This serves as a huge challenge for black men because of their lower contributions that take away from their expected goals as a father. Being unable to fulfill this role might cause them to stay away completely. Roberts accredits much of this problem to our society’s inability to pay black men the proper wages and even hire them as well. One thing that particularly bothered me was the governments push for marriage. Though there is supposed to be a separation of church and state the government still found it acceptable to create a program that give mothers monetary rewards for marrying. In a way this implies that a child can only be raised by two parents and in other words questions the capability of a woman. The program only encourages married couple and refuses to contribute to unmarried woman who lives with the working father of her child, I think it is a shame that they could push their preferences and reward those who follow. Especially coming from a single mother who has struggled and down it by herself. I think that should be awarded.

No Man’s Land
Gersons’ article discusses the evolvement of men as fathers. Gerson begins with the image of the breadwinner and though men are known for this she also discusses women’s financial contributions Though we cannot deny a women’s contributions its still socially hard to accept because it threatens men’s contributions to the family. Through time Gerson shows that women of different backgrounds have gone on to take many roles. With all this being known Gerson specifically focuses on the success of women in comparison to the less need of the fatherly role. Which ultimately threatens their masculinity. This has forced us all to truly look at for the appropriate definition of manhood serving as an even harder task for men, Though the roles have started to balance as far as financial contributions the role for domestic contributions has not. Women are now in positions where they contribute twice as much. With the lack of equality increasing it is hard to not connect that with the increase of divorce rates. With the new found independence for women men are finding themselves discouraged in a women’s need for them ultimately connecting with the rates of marriage at an older age for men. I respect Gersons perspective because instead of looking at men and women as black and white she sees that it is not that simple and questions the individual instead.
The Myth of Masculinity
In The Myth of Masculinity Gerson interconnects the changes in workplace opportunities, and relationships with children. Gerson highlights the struggle that men endure in redefining themselves as well as adjusting to the broader redefinition of a society they are not used to. This serves as a challenge because they have been taught the opposite growing up and seen the opposite in the actions of their fathers, uncles, and grandfathers. These boys build their image of masculinity around the men they see. Gerson makes sure to not completely categorize and still as in the other article stress the importance of individuals. With this being said Gerson says that due to the loosely termed word masculinity we cannot accredit to the reason men are the way they are and are the fathers they are. Though this new society is in search for the definition it is important for men to keep things into perspective and not do the minimal but realize their role is a father entails a lot.
Having it all:
Deutsch’s article focuses on working couples relationship in the household. Deutsch credits the balance of responsibilities in this type of family to the need for balance. Housework and responsibilities are expected from both and would not be possible without both. With the common concept that it takes a family to raise a child it only seems logical for both parents to have a major role. Though childcare is a common resource for working parents she stresses the importance of finding the time to actively participate in the development of the child. Though there is a clear change in the emotional roles of men with their children there is not much change for women because they have always contributed so much. Women have always contributed so much to the emotional aspect of the child’s development and even before they began working it was clear the house would not be run without them. What’s tricky about this situation is men’s tendency to lean on what we have all accepted as the mother’s major role and still not split the roles evenly.